all posts, eczema hacks, miscellaneous

sleep training and skin drying, a midwinter’s tale

cat sleeping
Photo by Fabricio Trujillo on Pexels.com

The little one is beginning to have a routine emerge. So far she fights all forms of sleep training and instead functions on a growing stable sets of principles.

  • Bedtime is 9pm.
  • Midnight to 2am is the start range for the late-night meal.
  • 5am-6am is the start range for the early morning meal, but a second attempt at sleeping afterwards will be successful.
  • 6am-8:30am is the relaxed independent wake-up time range where self play is initiated until boredom or some confined position occurs and it’s time to wake up mom.

At the moment, I don’t really mind this schedule, save for experiencing the skin drying out feeling each time I wake up. The apartment has central heating, which equates to forced air from ceiling vents, which feels great but does tend to dry me out especially as I’m up three times each “night” period. I have a moisturizer by my bed (which I’m starting to think every non-moisturizer withdrawing person should do) so every time I get back in it I reapply to all my problem spots (feet and hands primarily, but also knees and elbows).

It’s annoying because we’ve officially hit that time of year where there’s a consistent wetness in the air outside, and temperatures vary from 40 to 14 Fahrenheit. As a result, my skin gets damp and itchy, I’m constantly bundling up to stay warm, and I can’t keep moisturize on my skin to save my life.

But back to Fiona. Last night she fell asleep at 7pm instead of 9pm (which was a feat in itself and aided by the fact that she hadn’t napped since the morning). What was the result? Feedings at 9pm and 3am, and we’ll see where the terminal night feed lands, but I’d guess it will be around 5am now.

I think it’s fascinating that she has her own internal clock developing. She has never been a great sleeper but she is slowly adding hours in like with a late morning nap she eventually takes that lasts from 2 to 3.5 hours. At first I was really frazzled that she didn’t do what all the books and sites say, which was to settle down around 6pm and be asleep by 6:30/7pm consistently, but then I realized it wasn’t helping either of us that I was getting stressed out when no amount of routining could successfully have her asleep before 8pm each night. She also got so inconsolable with our few day stints of attempts to sleep train her, and it would carry on into the next day. When I finally stopped trying to get her on the “normal” schedule, she got happier, so I got happier, so she slept longer, so I slept longer, and my skin started to heal more- winter dryness and all.

That had been a hugely frustrating part of this new baby life. There are so many external pressures to have a baby that conforms to the general standards that society has deemed the norm, that when yours doesn’t, it can be so mentally taxing.

For example, so many of the pediatricians I saw told me Fiona was too small, therefore not eating enough. The newest pediatrician pulled up the growth curve and showed that Fiona was tracking perfectly for a baby in the 5 percentile (aka she is growing consistently, but is a small baby as far as “norms” go). But instead of understanding that for the first 6 or so months, I lived in fear that I wasn’t feeding her enough, but also knowing that I was on the most hypoallergenic diet I could be (no dairy, soy, gluten, eggs, rice, oats, corn) and that breastfeeding reduced her risk of getting eczema. It was a vicious mental gymnastic I had to contend with, with every comment about how small she was, or every assumption that when she cried that she was hungry, really sucker punching me in the gut. It amped my stress levels up so much and so it is little wonder I had stagnant skin healing for months (on top of fluctuations in my amounts of sleep).

But now, though some of the old thoughts still rear their ugly heads, I have found more peace with the situation, especially as I see Fiona make developmental milestones. And subsequently new calmness is helping my lizard skin slowly regain its shine, even if this north east winter is trying its darnest to dry me out.

all posts, miscellaneous

happy nonsensical non-sequiturs for winter

three brown wooden letters wall decor
Photo by rawpixel.com on Pexels.com

I know usually I have this whole elaborate set-up of a theme that then ties back to eczema or life with eczema, but today I am just winging it. Today I feel like chatting about all the little random things that have been going on since it’s a new month and the winter season is basically in full effect here as it hit below 20 degrees Fahrenheit the other day!

I guess the first big change to announce is that we are moving! We’ve put our home on the market and we are just waiting to see who bites before we take a chance and move to try living nearer to Jake’s work (re: into the city). This will be the first time I live in a city proper, and though we don’t plan to buy, and don’t plan to live there too long, it feels like it’ll be an adventure of its own.

Though it seems like an impromptu change, we’ve been talking about it for a while and we realize it will help improve our health in a number of ways. One, the commute to Jake’s work is a nightmare (almost 2 hours one way now), and the traffic even in our town, which is a fair distance from the major city, almost always is brutal, even just trying to drive to our grocery store. Today we started looking into studies about how commutes can impact quality of life. Multiple studies indicate that longer commutes increase adipose tissue, blood pressure, and more, and not just because of driving entailing sitting for a long time. This older NPR article was a fun read about how to be happy where you live, as well as how humans can get used to all kinds of factors: cold weather, higher taxes, etc, all much more easily than they can adjust to traffic.

Then another reason for our desire to move besides the commute is that our neighborhood is lovely, but it is a bit difficult to navigate by foot, which tends to be my preferred mode of transportation. Trying to walk around the neighborhood with Fiona means me wandering along quite a few hilly roads with no sidewalks and drivers that often zoom by blindly unaware of my approach, or me getting my choice of which dead-end road I want to traverse and then reverse back up, and me encountering few neighbors because the local stores and community areas are QUITE a hike for me to tote a baby to right now, especially with the temperature drop. Not being able to roam is definitely making me into a hermit and decreasing my NEAR and exposure to outdoor weather.

So in short we are moving (or rather, prepped and ready to move as soon as we close the house sale). When we do close, Fiona will be driving us to our new place as she has been taking lessons with dad:

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We’ve also been trying to create other ways to help improve our health including getting into more herbs and pickled things. We are trying to work on increasing our micronutrients in our diet, and my foray into herbs (beyond the seasonings we put on food already) has started with tea. I came across this recipe from Commonwealth Herbs for gut health and I am enjoying it immensity. You drink a quart a day, and each quart has 2 tablespoons of the herbal mix. I followed the basic mix, which includes chamomile, ginger, fennel, licorice, plantain calendula, and peppermint.

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I also have been getting into using this frother stick thing that Jake got me that makes me instant “latte” foam. My newest “milk” that I’m experimenting with for my lattes is hemp milk and I love it. It’s got a weird aroma that reminds me of marshmallows in hot chocolate and those Vienna brand finger cookies from my Poppop’s house back in the day. On that note I also think it would be delicious on top of some hot chocolate… but I’ll try that another day.

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Speaking of tea, I got that mug at Marshall’s the other day (because I’m trying to make a collection of eclectic mugs), among other things- things mostly gnome-themed. I do love me some gnomes. I’ve been making this joke a lot, but it’s starting to look like Gnomemas in our house. We got a standing gnome to guard the front door that is currently taller than Fiona, a gnome-themed blanket for me to use in our TV room when I get chilled, and this lovely gnome couch pillow (shown below). Not to mention my personal travel gnome, Schmebulon Junior (I’ll be impressed if anyone knows what that name is in reference to). All in all I’m feeling festive!

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Also I got Jake into the spirit, so he co-decided to get this runner for our dining room table, along with a little tree plant, and I got this weird looking wooden polar bear.

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And of course we’ve started amassing presents. Though to be honest, most of them are belated birthday presents for my sister who I haven’t seen since the summer!!

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We have yet to get the tree though and we still have yet to put up lights, but we are getting there!! Projects for the weekend.

Speaking of gifts and “tis the season”… I am now the proud owner of The Lord of the Rings all-in-one trilogy book. Jake and I are still working on developing our ‘winter season is Tolkien season’ tradition and this is starting it off! I am quite excited though I do still have 7 library books to finish off before I can delve into only Tolkien.

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And lastly, the other day when we were out and about during an our open house, my family trio went to Salem and explored. My eyes fell upon this little guy and it was love at first sight: Screen Shot 2018-12-06 at 9.49.31 AM

It’s a heating/cooling pad that can be put in the microwave or freezer respectively to get it the desired temperature. I am always cold so I love warming him up and throwing him over my neck. Ahh, it doesn’t get much better. And the fact that it’s shaped like a sheep is just another plus as I love sheep things as much as I love gnomes.

But how does it all relate back to eczema? Well, this time of the year can be incredible rough to the lay-skin person (my word for a person with intact epidermal layers). It’s getting dark around 4pm, there is less sunlight overall so we all can become vitamin D deficit more easily, the cold makes all skin dryer and heating systems do the same, and the holidays are spread out enough that everyone feels like we are just sprinting to make it to the next one. Now add that disastrous skin barrier and generally a weakened immune system when people tend to spread sicknesses around the most, and we have a recipe for months of frustration. That’s where the winter cheer and enjoying the little things really becomes so important. I have been trying to throw myself into the little warming moments like seeing my little one in an elf hat, or getting a heating pad in the shape of a sheep, or making challenges with my husband to do 30 consecutive days of walking outside together even if it’s freezing outside. Obviously I can’t control the temperature of all buildings or always keep myself warm, so instead it becomes important to focus on the fun: those day to day minute tokens that can create a lovely atmosphere all around, and buffer the time in between when we can go spend the holidays with our family. The overarching goal is de-stressing via just enjoying life, and embracing seasonality and festivities personally really helps.

If you are feeling winter weather blues, I advise giving it a go. Dress your house up with small things that embrace your chosen beliefs or just the weather (like burning pine and fir candles or decorating with snowmen and colors like blue and white, evergreen and touches of bright red. Drink hot beverages of choice (tea, hot cocoa, mulled wines, hot toddies), and make time to spend moments with people you love. Get outside to feel the bitter chill bite your cheeks, just to make coming back inside feel so nice as you thaw again. Read a seasonal book, watch a seasonal movie, or listen to some seasonal music, while ensconced in thick and warm home blankets. Take warm baths with whatever your choice of salts and scents are, garb yourself in colorful scarves and hats and mittens, and see how you feel. Make this time special and memorable and let me know if it makes winter and your skin feel a bit more bearable.

 

REFERENCES

Hoehner CM, Barlow CE, Allen P, Schootman M. Commuting Distance, Cardiorespiratory Fitness, and Metabolic Risk. Am J Prev Med. 2013 Jun 1; 42(6): 571-578.

“How to ‘Thrive’: Short Commutes, More Happy Hours.” NPR: Talk of the Nation, https://www.npr.org/2013/02/18/171926131/how-to-thrive-short-commutes-more-happy-hours. Accessed 6 Dec 2018.